Extended-family bereavement leave is time off granted to employees who have lost a family member who does not fall under the “immediate family” definition in their employer’s policy — typically grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, in-laws, or close family friends. While most bereavement leave policies cover spouses, children, parents, and siblings, the growing recognition that grief extends beyond nuclear families has prompted many employers to offer broader bereavement provisions. According to the Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development (CIPD), 76% of UK employers now offer paid bereavement leave, with an increasing number extending coverage beyond immediate family (CIPD, 2024).
Grief does not follow a hierarchy. The loss of a grandparent who raised you, an aunt who was your mentor, or a cousin who was your closest friend can be just as devastating as losing an immediate family member — yet many employees find their employer’s bereavement policy does not cover those relationships. Understanding extended-family bereavement leave helps you navigate what your employer offers, what the law requires, and how to make the case for the time off you need.
Key Takeaways
- Extended-family bereavement leave covers losses outside immediate family, such as grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, in-laws, or close family friends.
- UK law provides two weeks of paid parental bereavement leave but does not mandate extended-family coverage — employer policies vary widely.
- In the US, there is no federal bereavement leave law; coverage depends on employer policy, state laws, and FMLA eligibility for qualifying events.
- Many companies are expanding bereavement policies beyond immediate family to include “chosen family” and close relationships.
- You can request extended bereavement leave by providing documentation and explaining the nature of your relationship with the deceased.
What Is Extended-Family Bereavement Leave?
Extended-family bereavement leave refers to paid or unpaid time off granted to employees following the death of a family member who falls outside the “immediate family” category defined by a company’s bereavement policy. While immediate family typically includes a spouse, domestic partner, child, parent, or sibling, extended family generally encompasses grandparents, grandchildren, aunts, uncles, nieces, nephews, cousins, in-laws, and step-family relationships.
Some progressive employers also include “chosen family” — close friends, mentors, or non-biological family figures who played a significant role in the employee’s life. The Society for Human Resource Management (SHRM) reports that approximately 63% of US employers offer paid bereavement leave, but only about 20% extend it beyond immediate family (SHRM, 2024).
Who Counts as Extended Family?
The definition of “extended family” varies by employer, but most policies use one of these frameworks:
| Relationship | Typically Covered? | Notes |
|---|---|---|
| Grandparents / grandchildren | Usually yes | Often included even in basic policies |
| Aunts / uncles | Sometimes | More common in expanded policies |
| Cousins | Rarely | Usually requires a special request |
| In-laws (parents-in-law, siblings-in-law) | Sometimes | Often listed separately from biological family |
| Step-family (step-parents, step-siblings) | Varies | Growing recognition in modern policies |
| Close family friends / mentors | Rarely | Typically falls under “chosen family” provisions |
| Domestic partner’s family | Sometimes | Often covered under equivalent-to-spouse clauses |
If your policy does not explicitly list a relationship, you can still request bereavement leave by explaining the significance of the relationship to your manager or HR team. Many employers evaluate these requests on a case-by-case basis.
Legal Requirements by Jurisdiction
United Kingdom
UK employment law provides specific bereavement entitlements, but they are limited in scope:
- Parental Bereavement Leave and Pay — The UK’s Children and Families Act 2010 (amended in 2020) grants parents who lose a child under 18, or a stillborn after 24 weeks of pregnancy, two weeks of statutory leave. This leave is paid at the lower of 90% of average weekly earnings or £184.03 per week (2025/26 rate) (GOV.UK, Parental Bereavement Leave).
- Statutory bereavement leave for other relationships — There is no statutory right to bereavement leave for the death of an extended family member. Coverage depends entirely on employer policy.
- Compassionate leave — Many employers offer “compassionate leave” or “bereavement leave” as a contractual benefit beyond statutory minimums.
United States
There is no federal law requiring employers to provide bereavement leave in the US. However:
- FMLA — If the death of a family member triggers a serious health condition in the employee (such as clinical depression), FMLA leave may apply. The family member must be a spouse, child, or parent under FMLA’s narrow definition.
- State laws — Oregon became the first state to require paid bereavement leave in 2023, covering the death of a family member (including in-laws and domestic partners). Washington and Illinois have similar provisions.
- Employer policies — The majority of US bereavement leave is employer-provided. SHRM data shows most companies offer 3–5 days for immediate family and 1–3 days for extended family.
Australia
There is no statutory bereavement leave in Australia, but the National Employment Standards (NES) provide two days of paid compassionate leave per occasion for employees and casual workers when a member of their immediate family or household dies or suffers a life-threatening illness or injury (Fair Work Act 2009, s.195). Extended family members not in the household are generally not covered by the NES.
How to Request Extended-Family Bereavement Leave
Follow these steps to request extended-family bereavement leave:
- Check your employee handbook. Review your company’s bereavement or compassionate leave policy to see if your relationship is listed. If it is not listed, do not assume you are not entitled — many policies allow case-by-case discretion.
- Notify your manager promptly. Contact your manager or HR team as soon as possible. Most policies require notification within 1–3 days of the death.
- Provide supporting documentation. This typically includes a death certificate, funeral notice, or a letter from a family member confirming the relationship. For extended family, you may also need to explain the closeness of the relationship.
- Specify the duration you need. Be clear about how many days you are requesting. If your policy offers two days for immediate family, you might request the same or a slightly shorter period for an extended family member.
- Agree on coverage arrangements. Before you leave, discuss how your responsibilities will be handled in your absence. This makes the approval process smoother and reduces stress.
Company Policies: What Good Extended Bereavement Leave Looks Like
Leading employers are recognising that grief is not limited to nuclear families. Here is how progressive companies structure their policies:
| Policy Approach | Description | Examples |
|---|---|---|
| Tiered leave | Different leave durations based on relationship closeness | 5 days immediate, 3 days extended, 1 day distant |
| Flat bereavement leave | Same leave for any qualifying bereavement | 5 days for any family death |
| Flexible / manager discretion | No fixed categories; leave determined case-by-case | Common in startups and tech companies |
| Chosen family provision | Includes close friends and non-biological relationships | Growing trend in progressive organisations |
The most supportive policies combine paid leave with additional benefits such as access to grief counselling, flexible return-to-work arrangements, and bereavement-specific Employee Assistance Program (EAP) resources.
Frequently Asked Questions
Does bereavement leave cover grandparents?
It depends on your employer’s policy. Many UK and US employers include grandparents in their bereavement leave provisions, but this is not universally guaranteed. UK statutory bereavement leave only covers the death of a child. Check your employee handbook or ask HR about your specific entitlement.
Can I take bereavement leave for a close friend?
In most jurisdictions, there is no legal requirement to grant bereavement leave for the death of a friend. However, some progressive employers include “chosen family” or “non-family member” provisions in their policies. If your company does not have such a policy, you can request compassionate leave and explain the significance of the relationship.
How many days of bereavement leave do I get for an extended family member?
The typical entitlement is 1–3 days for extended family members, compared to 3–5 days for immediate family. UK statutory provisions do not cover extended family at all. Your exact entitlement depends on your employer’s policy and your length of service.
What documentation do I need for bereavement leave?
Most employers require a death certificate, funeral director’s letter, or obituary notice. For extended family, you may also need to provide evidence of the relationship. You are generally not required to disclose private family details beyond confirming the relationship.
Can my employer deny my bereavement leave request?
If the death qualifies under your employer’s bereavement policy, the leave cannot be denied. If the relationship falls outside the policy, your employer has discretion to approve or decline. In the UK, employees with 26+ weeks of service can take unpaid parental bereavement leave regardless of employer policy. In the US, bereavement leave is entirely at the employer’s discretion unless covered by FMLA or state law.
This article is general information, not legal advice. Consult a qualified employment lawyer for guidance on your specific jurisdiction and circumstances.
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